The scene: The bathtub, about a year and a half ago.
The players: John and Maia.
Maia makes a grab for John's groin.
John: Hey, Maia! Ouch! Don't!
Me: Maia, hey. Keep your hands to yourself. That's John's body, and you need to respect that.
John: Yeah, and besides, Maia, you have your own penis.
Me: Um, no, she doesn't, John.
John: Well, she has a bagina, but it's the same thing.
Me: Actually, John, you know it's not.
John: Well, kinda! But hers doesn't wiggle.