Monday, February 07, 2005

The Vanguard II

John ended up leaving Sarah at home the other day. We had talked a little about bringing her in, Matt and I desperately trying to avoid anything that smelled like, "Well, we don't want kids to think you're weird, which you're not." He must have picked up on our ambivalence, which makes me feel guilty, relieved, disappointed, annoyed and horrible all at the same time, and ended up bringing a Matchbox-sized Hummer instead (I know, I know!).

Maia, of course, wanted to bring Khaki to day care that day. It was hard for John to see her walk out with Khaki in her arms. It was hard to see John watching her. "Well, I guess kids Maia's age just haven't learned how to tease yet," he said, a little ruefully.

While that just about broke my heart, I also found it interesting. To me, it implies that Maia would be a target for teasing if she were older. In his mind, perhaps children tease about dolls based on age, not gender. Maybe it's not a step forward. But at least with marching in place, you feel like there's some movement.


  1. Waaaaah!!!!! Poor John. Maybe he could write a story about his "friend" Sarah just as a little project at home or something? I suck at advice. Poor John!

  2. It does suck. Boys can't win either...they can't like dolls and they can't like guns. You know what I mean? I fought the gun/power ranger/ninja turtle thing tooth and nail until one day when I was having one of those "Oh, these boys, always wanting those darned guns, how awful" conversations with another mom and realized, oh my god, I'm totally putting him down in this weird subconscious way right in front of him. So now we live in Bionicle land. But he also still loves to carry around his sister's play purse. But I am sad that he's starting to label things as "girl things"--things like "loving" your friends. Aaagh.